previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
Lipsinki, I look forward to seeing your hometown.
Uh, uh, Vorunax, this is my teacher, uh, uh, Ms. Rabblebible.
Ah, Ms. Rabblebible, nice to meet you. You, uh, educated quite a pupil, from what I know.
Oh, thank- thank you, thank you. Uh, yes, yes, yes, come, come in, uh, uh, well, uh, let's talk.
She leads you down into the village and to the school.
And up here is where we keep, uh, our Grancises.
Grancises?
Yeah, multiple.
Plural?
Yeah, that's where-
Many Grancises.
Many grancye. Uh, yeah, yeah, Grancises, grancye, yeah, uh, yeah, that's where they all end up.
What? Why?
Uh, well, because, uh, we found Grancises, is, uh, they are, uh, travelers, uh, and we,
uh, like to keep them all in one place, uh, because they are dangerous to, well, orcas.
You know, I never thought that it would be like this. It's different.
Yeah, no, I'll take your weapon, please.
Oh, no, I- you know what? It means so much to me.
And here in Abyss, I- I cannot use it, yes?
Ah, true. In you go.
She goes in.
You are lost in this conscious state.
You go- you're, like, pulled into yourself at this moment.
And you're standing in this black, empty space.
The walls around you are gone.
You don't have your weapons.
You are alone.
Everything goes silent.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
I'm your dungeon master, Russ More.
He, him, also with me today is Tom Lair.
Yeah, that's me, he, him.
I am playing, uh, Flint, or Bort, or maybe a combo of both.
Who knows? We'll see.
Uh, and they both go by he, him as well.
And Amy More.
Well, that just threw me for a loop.
That's me.
I'm playing Thea Amastasia, she, her, and Night Hunter, who is she, they,
and I am she, her, and I am curious about what Tom just said.
Tom doesn't know what's going on.
Or does he?
Carla Mack's dead.
I trust nothing.
She, her, playing Lipsinki, Pip Diggins, also she, her.
Also trusts nothing.
And Kyle Glasset.
That's me, him, he, him, losing his religion in the corner as Vorunax,
and also he, him, glad to be back.
Always.
Well, it's not bad.
Why wouldn't you be back?
You're a regular cast member.
That's right.
I didn't say that.
I didn't say it at all.
I'll cut it.
Yeah.
That's right.
Lovely to have you all here.
I can't wait for this.
Before we started recording, I did point out that
this is the last page in my season two book for notes, so.
Yeah, so things are not gonna go.
I'm not starting a new book for this one, everybody.
Impressive.
He's got like that one blank page that you see at the end of a line to a notebook,
so we've got a little bit of room, but not.
I've got, yeah, one, two, and then the back panel.
So three potential writing spaces, so that.
And a quarter of that page, so like.
Oh, that'll be.
Are we talking eight and a half by 11 or like just a steno pad or what do you got?
Eight by six, 10 by six, eight by four, no, eight by six.
Let's go eight by six.
Maybe nine and a half by six.
Okay.
Welcome to our new podcast, Measuring Notebooks,
where we don't have a ruler.
It's a two part series where one part we guess,
we all make an educated guess, argue about it,
and then the next part we actually get a ruler or a measuring tape and find it.
Mine just says on the front of my book.
Yeah, I would say our guesses would not even be very educated.
No, probably not, because I wouldn't even show you the book.
No, yeah, you'll just say it's a notebook and we'll go, oh, this is the color.
Where you can get all of those things if we do them is over on Patreon,
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, where when you are a patron,
you also get an episode dedicated to you like today's patron, Garrett Taylor.
Thank you, Garrett.
Thanks, Garrett.
You're awesome.
Too cool.
You can put in your guesses for how big this notebook is.
Please let us know.
In our Discord.
We will take any guesses and then let you know.
If I haven't thrown it out by then.
It's going to be real weird when people start putting guesses in there and I go, what?
And we're like, it's going to be in the future and we're not going to remember at all.
It's going to be months from now.
February, probably February.
So just put it in your calendars to be ready for-
It's not even December, y'all.
Yep.
Right?
I mean, we're totally recording this right before it comes out.
I mean, yeah.
Yeah.
Peek behind the curtain.
All right.
Thanks, Garrett.
Fuck it.
Let's play.
Yeah.
We hear the sound of three subsequent thuds that hit the ground after Thea,
Bort, and Guacamole finished their descent from the hole that they were
just sucked into having been led there by Garrett.
Everything is completely dark around you.
There's this echoing hum that you hear.
And a shining spotlight beams down upon the two of you.
And Thea, you look across to where you expect to see the body of a dragon-scaled flint
and see a blue-scaled dragonborn
that you recognize as the physical body of Bort.
No one told me there was going to be a costume change.
It's all about the reveal, honey.
Thea doesn't laugh at that.
What? How?
It's news to me, too.
Well, I mean, it makes me somehow less mad at you, but only slightly.
OK, I can work with that.
More so confused.
Yep, that's two of us.
Is the spotlight maybe like shines and shows your inner self?
I mean, I have as much knowledge as you do of the situation.
Thea looks down at herself just to be like,
like, still me.
Are we still shackled?
Were you shackled before?
No.
Yes, you're still shackled.
Wait, yeah, forget I said that.
Thea goes over and like makes sure Gwok's OK.
I assume she probably kind of flapped herself down.
I don't think a bird can naturally fall from a distance and not.
The shackled, though.
It's legs, sure wings.
You shackle birds.
All right.
You know what?
Maybe it is.
I don't know.
I only picture feet like in the animated Robin Hood.
Yes, sure.
Yep.
Not not the wings.
Yeah.
God, it's so good, guys.
She's got a concussion.
Well, it's because I don't know how mad I am at Bort right now
and how to properly express myself.
I know I threw you into it.
I know.
So how do we get out of here?
Well, you somehow figured out how to like totally get into somebody else's body.
So do you have any ideas of how we get out of here?
Well, I mean, I didn't I was put there.
I didn't figure it out.
You were like invited.
You were like a rude guest who wouldn't leave.
I left for a while.
Did you?
I mean, as much as I could.
Yeah, I just don't think it's really fair that, you know, Flint,
it's I don't want to say like a parasite,
but like, you know, when a parasite lives in a host and lives off of that host
and is able to thrive and just like be lucky to be alive because of that host,
but then takes over and kills the host.
OK, I hear what you're saying.
I don't think it's a fair characterization of what happened,
but I'll play along with the metaphor.
I mean, only the strong survive.
What can I say?
There's a flashing red light.
See, you said something wrong.
And a blaring horn that echoes out.
What kind of horn?
Blaring like.
Sorry.
It sounds like a guttural, echoing belch.
And then the light goes off and the horn goes out.
You're still standing in the spotlight.
Do you ever sometimes feel like you're in the middle of a game you don't know how to play?
I mean, yeah, that's kind of been my whole thing lately.
Why don't you step outside the spotlight for a sec?
There's a magic light showing me what's truly inside of Flint.
Can I get out of the spotlight, Ross?
Do you attempt to get out of the spotlight?
Don't fucking DM him right now.
Yeah, I'll start to like move towards,
maybe put a hand in out of the spotlight first, see what happens.
Bort goes and puts his hand outside of the spotlight and you lose all visibility.
You can still feel your feel your appendage,
but you can't see anything beyond where the light ends.
Still have your arm there.
I mean, feels like it.
I don't know.
Yeah, I think so.
I'll bring it back in.
Pull it back into the light.
It looks as it looks the same as it went down.
Okay, got some good magical darkness going on here.
I'd stick my head out, but frankly,
I was worried something was going to come and like
slice off your arm or something.
So oh my God, I didn't even think of that.
Oh, me neither.
We cut to Little Leaf.
Carla, describe me Hesse's
Magatorium.
I like it.
I think in opposition to what I would like,
what Carla would normally picture,
which would be like lots of vials and candles and just sort of chaos.
It is not that.
We're talking like sleek Scandinavian minimalism.
You wouldn't even know it was a Magatorium.
Does she know Arvid?
Because I feel that kind of clinical sleekness we've seen before.
Hadn't thought of that, but I mean, maybe.
Arvid's been around, I'm sure.
I mean, we all know Arvid's been around.
Arvid's certainly been around.
So yeah, it's very much like more fancy doctor's waiting room
than Hodgepodge of Esoterica.
Love it.
We see Lipsinki and Vorunax standing behind
a short-robed, very clean-cut gnome.
She's very carefully mixing ingredients into a vial,
and she pauses for a moment, turns around, and says,
Vorunax, if I could be so kind as to, well, could I have a scale?
Certainly, if it helps us achieve what we need to,
and I just pull out a little dagger and just kind of nick one off, hand it over.
Nope.
Does that hurt?
A little bit, but in comparison to recent events, not so much.
Of course, of course.
Well, maybe perhaps we will assist in that,
although you seem to be doing okay, no blood, okay,
as she turns around and puts it into a very small mortar and pestle and grinds it up
and adds it into the beaker, and it begins to bubble up to the brim
and then settles back down in this iridescent orange color.
Well, we've got, we need to get you back to the abyss.
Correct. What have you done so far? What did you just do there?
Well, we've created a bit of a break between the barriers between our reality
and the reality of the abyss. We will use this to open a gateway, a doorway, if you will.
So, you will have to consume it.
I know that's a little bit auto cannibalistic at this point.
I should have told you that first, perhaps.
But again, for the better good to get you back to where you need to go.
The only issue is, as you have perhaps not iterated yet, is where and where you're going.
Do we have a way to attune you, an item that lives, that comes from there?
Maybe. My arm is there, but I wouldn't want to appear where my arm is currently.
I don't think that would be wise.
The arm that you're missing. Yes, of course, yes.
Of course. There is a person I can think of that might be easiest to pinpoint,
mainly because, as far as I know and as far as I've heard, there's an infinite amount of this
one person currently on Thanatos, and they're a very powerful wizard.
Really? What do you mean to say when you say infinite amount of a single person?
Imagine, if you will, someone's timeline being fractured into an infinite amount of parts,
all of them being contained within one torturous cell for eternity.
Save for one shard who's been out and about and doing their own thing,
but that's neither here nor there.
As far as I know, they all exist on the plane of Thanatos, so I've actually prepared
a spell where I can reach out to this person. It may drive me a little bit mad if things go
wrong, but perhaps that could create the connection to at least the one that I know of,
the one that I've encountered.
This is enlightening. Just a moment, I need to capture some of this. She turns around,
she begins scrolling into her notebook. She's on the last page of that notebook.
I'll get everything I can down about this. To fracture a being across different time streams,
that would create some sort of paradox in and upon itself. While that sounds like a torturous
event, it actually sounds like it's containing something that could be very catastrophic.
It's true. It's very much a box of sorts that we don't really want to open the lid.
I feel the alternative at this point, knowing what I've been told from Lipsinki,
I'd be willing to take the gamble.
Lipsinki, I don't know how you feel about it. Do you think...
I know Grancis is about as well as you do, I feel.
I think it's actually probably a great idea because I know
in the future when you and I were together, sometimes we were making, I don't know, like
10, 20 new Grancises a week. He was kind of everyone's favorite to torture.
It's really fun.
Which seems weird to say in front of you, so just maybe forget I said that. I came back
in time to save the world, so let's focus on that.
Bygones be bygones.
And also all...
The present.
Yes.
Yeah.
We've all made choices. We've all done things.
Yes.
If we live to tell the tale, I will regale you with all of those types.
I can't wait to come back after we finish saving the world and find out
kind of exactly what you're talking about.
The epilogue on Hesses is going to be lengthy.
She has a tattoo that she really regrets.
Well, without that anchor or a way to peer in, this will get you there.
Okay.
As you have been there, you are an anchor in and of yourself,
but you have been many places in the abyss, so there's no exact location.
But if your spell that you have prepared works to perhaps view into or listen into,
we could be able to, for a brief moment, tap into that.
Well, as far as I know, if things go well, then I will be able to mentally reach out to them
across planes for about a minute.
Do you think that would buy us time?
I...
Yes.
Give me a moment to prepare a few things.
I will be right back.
I just have to go get a couple more things from the stores.
Very well.
She hops down off of a stool and zips through a back door.
It whistles as it closes.
Now, I know we have more important things to discuss, but what do you think she meant?
Sounded like Hess's has done something or...
I mean, I'm going to guess secret agent.
Yeah, I can see that.
I mean...
Yeah, I mean, I don't know, but just seems fun.
For a person of, you know, no offense, but for a person in this town,
being able to send people across planes seems rather strange, personally.
I wouldn't expect that, but...
Yeah, I mean, she was always here when I was growing up, so I didn't think much of it.
But I mean, yeah, that's pretty wild, right?
That just in our tiny little village, there's such a powerful mage.
So, I mean, God, we need to save the world,
because I really want to come back here and find out what she's all about.
Agreed, because now it seems like somebody that powerful,
coming to a place like this, is hiding from something or someone.
Absolutely.
The door whistles back open.
She comes back up and says, well, we've got a bit of a hair of a unicorn here.
The scroll here should tell me exactly how to mix this in exactly the right time.
Whenever you're ready.
Varnock sits down and he begins to just start chanting,
switching between abyssal, common, and draconic.
And every once in a while, when it comes around to common,
you hear Grancis mentioned, but eventually his eyes start to kind of turn.
This like deep purple with swirling black.
And I'm going to make my intelligence save.
And God, I hope I beat the DC.
Let's see.
What spell is it we're doing?
Then you press S.
I am doing contact other plane.
Oh, OK, cool, cool, cool.
Grancis chat.
Yeah.
However, I got a seven on my intelligence saving throw,
and the DC is 15, which means I take 66 psychic damage.
Wow.
Well, good thing you got a buff of 200, hey?
Yeah, yeah.
So I take 22 and I am insane until I finish a long rest.
Yeah.
Does it still work or?
I really hope Hessis like put some vitamin C or something.
It doesn't.
It doesn't say it doesn't work.
Uh, I would think the fact that it did work is why it broke.
Yeah.
But on a successful save, I can ask up to five questions.
So like, it doesn't say that it doesn't work.
So no, I think it still works.
Like connection is made, but you just aren't allowed to ask questions.
Yeah, yeah, pretty much.
So the connection is made and you just hear,
you hear Voronok's just kind of sitting there.
Granzas, Thanatos, and just kind of mumbling to himself,
like looking wide eye at things that don't exist.
Night Hunter, you're standing in this void space.
The bars around you, every time you try to move towards them,
feel like you're never getting close to them, to grab them.
You hear the sound of a soft, very familiar voice behind you.
You turn and Elia is standing at 15 yards away from you.
Elia, it's like I cannot get close to bars.
They keep moving.
You keep moving.
I see that they're just, they're sort of,
I mean, you're not in a great place right now.
Of course I'm not in a great place, but you are here now, so that is good.
Do I really have to go anywhere?
What do I have to do?
Yes, true.
I mean, you were, I think on a bit of a mission to save the world,
but if you're happy just to
stay in the-
Well, you know, I was not only one.
I think I'm here with many people, but I've been in cell for,
I don't know, a few minutes, a few days.
I hear no one else.
How is home?
Did you guys defeat Orcus back on the beach?
Oh, um, I'm not sure, I'm not sure about that.
Did Opal finally get other cats out of woods?
Oh, well, for some reason I can't remember, but I'm almost certain it probably took a while.
You know what they're like.
I'm not sure what to do here, Elia.
I would admit to you, I would never say that to anybody else,
but to you, I am not sure.
I cannot reach Barth, part of me does not even want to anymore,
because now you are here.
So where do I have to go?
Have you tried calling for help?
It's so nice to be with you,
but it would be nice to be somewhere a little bit nicer.
Yes, this is...
We can get out of...
Well, I suppose I could.
It's just, you know, you know me.
I do not like, I do not like to ask for help, but...
Oh, I wasn't suggesting you actually say help.
I know, of course you would never, you would never do that.
I was thinking more, you know, shouting sort of one of those,
like a command, but you're actually asking a question.
You know how you do when you're...
Yes, I could do that.
Perhaps there are guards somewhere, or...
No, I am not sure what to say.
I feel a little embarrassed, you're watching me doing like this.
Oh, I'll turn around.
Oh, yes, thank you.
That is better.
There is a guard.
I need to speak with them now.
Was that good, Elia?
That was really good, that was really good.
It was very demanding.
People almost always listen to you because you're very intimidating.
That is what I noticed.
I do travel with some people here, though they have own ideas.
I'm not even, I do not even want to be here.
Hey.
Did you hear that?
Yes.
Hey.
Hello.
Night hunter, is that you?
Maybe.
Who is this?
It's your old buddy G-Dog.
It's Grancis.
Grancis?
Yeah, look to your left.
Night hunter slowly turns her head to the left.
There's a Grancis who's been hung and his spine is like protruding out of his back.
Sorry, to your right.
Night hunter like stares for a moment.
So what I feel like, I feel like she is in like a void where she can see the bars.
She's in a room but not really a room and things are just kind of like appearing.
You know when like you're watching theater and someone's standing on stage
and then something shows beside them and you're like oh was that there the whole time?
Exactly, yeah.
Yeah.
You see like a gaunt ghostly image of Grancis at a distance beyond these bars.
We probably shouldn't have let Jared put us in here.
Well you know it's not so bad for me.
I'm talking to Elia so.
Talking to who?
There's nobody there.
No, I'm talking to my wife.
She is right back there and it's okay here.
There's nobody there.
It's really rude for you to say that.
Elia, do you hear what he is saying to you?
Tell him no one calls him G-Dog.
Nobody calls you G-Dog.
So who is lying now?
Who is saying things that are not true?
That's right, it is you.
Yes, you have nothing to say now, do you Elia?
He has nothing to say.
I feel like I've won argument, right?
I feel I've won conversation.
You definitely won the argument.
Maybe ask him how um you know how we can you could get out of there or.
Well I mean I could ask but then I would not be with you so.
Oh no come on remember our vows.
I'm always with you in your heart so I mean wherever you go I'm going to be there.
So don't worry about that.
Yeah but when we make these vows one of us did not get sucked into abyss.
That was more like like theoretical type of things.
It's true we thought we were mostly going to be just dealing with opal problems.
You turn and you look back at Grancis and he looks like he's still talking
but you can't hear anything.
He's getting further and further away from you.
Then you turn and look back to Elia and you're alone in the cell again.
Elia?
Grancis what did you do with Elia?
It echoes out.
We cut back to Vorunax rocking back and forth.
Uh yeah like there's this there's this snapping sound and Lipsinki and Hessus
see Vorunax break.
He begins he like folds himself up begins rocking and like the chant almost continues
in a cyclical fashion after that.
This doesn't look right.
I mean I don't I haven't seen him do this particular thing but I've certainly seen a lot
of people go insane and um uh I know we're kind of on a time crunch here because he can
here because he can only maintain this you know connection for a minute but could you
like is there anything you could just like chuck in that?
Hessus is already turned around and is mixing up another uh another spell behind you like
mixing components um and turning around and it's like this salve that she moves over
uh to Vorunax and rubs like deep into his chest like moves underneath his
Is it fixed vapor rub?
It's fixed vapor rub.
It's totally fixed vapor rub.
You get the menthol eucalyptus smell that just courses up through you Vorunax um and
Your sinuses have never been cleaner.
Chanting slows and you in your your mental break begin to have clarity and it starts
to come back she's cast greater restoration on you.
Uh oh I've never cast that one before that was something I reached out for uh
don't know if I will again but thank you thank you Hessus.
Uh Grancis are you there?
Hello?
Grancis is there the um so
Grancis?
Hey.
Not a question.
Where are you?
Well I'm in a cell.
Who are you with?
Uh just just just me just me and and my book my book's here.
Good good.
Can we come to where you are?
Well if you want to be in this cell with me you could you could come here yeah yeah sure.
I heard Nighthunter come in earlier but I haven't
I haven't seen them lately.
Okay uh I'm kind of gonna explain it to Lipsinki just like well I'm in contact
I've got a couple questions left they're in a cell um but it would get us back there.
What do you say?
It's not like it's super well guarded or whatever down there I mean the whole place
you know.
Oh wait shit I still have my keys never mind let's.
I was gonna say do you still have a key fob?
Perfect yeah let's just get in the cell it's no problem.
Easy peasy.
Niddle you don't have to press that skip button.
Oh I did not see that coming.
Patreon mansion.
How are we gonna rhyme with Patreon?
I never do.
Every time Russ always finds like the wildest hardest word and it's like
this is this will be the last word in this dance.
I won't even try it.
He always ends sentences in orange and purple for some reason and it's just frustrating.
Can't get into that rhyming structure with you it makes it very difficult.
Anyways let's get to the meat of the business.
Did you learn that in improv class?
I learned it somewhere probably yeah I taught it to them in improv class.
How to shut a scene down 101.
Uh no is a good way and orange uh orange is also a good way.
Uh what are we talking about?
We have a live show coming up next week.
I'm shaking my finger at you.
He's just being very emphatic it's so close.
We're gonna have a lot of fun and we want you to be there.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast and guess what?
What?
Starting today starting today this very day.
This very day.
We now offer a seven day free trial when you sign up for a five dollar tier.
Oh wait question question.
Will people who have signed up for the free trial be able to attend the live stream?
100 percent.
It's like a loophole.
They have to come to the loophole themselves we don't point it out.
I'm sorry you come to the loophole.
Yeah but you do get access and maybe because you have so much fun you stay to eight days.
Maybe there's a lot of bonus content over there.
We're just about to record even more bonus content.
It just never stops.
So live show next week and if you sign up basically now through when the live show is
you get in for free because of that seven day free trial.
That seven day free trial doesn't stop uh that will always be available from now until
they take it away from us on the five dollar tier.
So new reason to go try to come over to Patreon and try it out just to see what you're missing
which is a whole lot of episodes.
So much stuff.
If you're already over there too like this is a good way to maybe like get your friends
to be like yeah no pressure but you should come see these these guys live show because
it's gonna be nuts.
There's a big pause after that.
I too know how to shut down a scene.
We all just were taking a moment to think like yeah it is gonna be nuts.
I was trying to think of something that didn't rhyme with nuts.
Now I can only think of things that rhyme with nuts.
That's right.
Thank you so much for being here.
We hope to see you at the live show next week and now we'll get you back to the
episode.
Thank you.
Bye.
We'll maintain the connection.
Do we both need to drink it?
How does this work?
Uh yes yes dear you see her madly and then okay and the ichor of the the madness
okay the ichor of the devil's madness crown and she squeezes this seed pod into the
into the vial and it turns like this black before going back to the orange.
Yes both of you need to take a drink as
as we only have a few more moments until this until your connection runs out uh do it do it now.
Yes cheers lip-synchy.
Cheers let's go save the world.
Sip sip sip.
Take a big swig and there's a shot shot shot shot shot shot shot shot shot shot shot.
And this this music in the background just rings up and all of the people from little
leaf come in and they're all just cheering you on.
All the sick ones.
Yeah that's right all the sickly individuals who can barely walk have made it for the
shot shot shot.
Rains in the roof.
And there's another deafening crack and the two of you have vanished from this location.
The red light glares again and that same guttural horn echoes out shaking your bones.
You hear from somewhere in the darkness this
droning moan coming from everywhere and nowhere all at the same time.
We don't have our weapons on us do we?
I'm pretty sure everybody had their weapons.
Yeah?
Yeah I don't think we took the weapon.
Okay well also I'm magic so.
Jared's bad.
Yeah Jared's really not very good at his job.
Jared's not great at his job thank goodness.
Yeah.
Yeah all right so I feel surrounded.
Um do you have any do you have any suggestions or?
I know nothing really come to mind other than like let's try and get these chains off of us.
Bort pulls out the battle axe that he's got and tries to uh to free you if he can
reach you I'm assuming he'd be able to.
Well cutting down to like your own foot would be difficult with bAlydince.
Yeah that's true see you though is like whoa whoa whoa whoa.
Yeah big like two-handed chop down on your chains.
Yeah it swings down and echoes out and you you look back and the chains have broken
shattered on the ground there's a crack up through your axe though.
Thanks.
I mean I just hope it was worth it.
Oh just hope it was worth it.
Do you have something to say to me?
No just hope it's worth it.
Your turn she reaches out her hand for the axe.
Yeah hand it over.
Hope you've enjoyed having both of your legs.
Do I have to roll?
He's proficient I probably held an axe like four times I don't know.
Uh yeah roll give me a roll uh plus strength.
Okay oh god.
So it's plus two roll a d20.
Okay yeah no I'm just like I'm I'm making my intention it's not to actually cut off his leg.
20 not natural.
You swing the axe down with your eyes open or closed.
Closed I'm gonna freak him out as much as possible.
No you swing you swing the axe down you're squinting as you do it
and right before the blade hits you see a glimpse of a clear picture of flint before you.
The axe connects and shatters the shackles and Bort is before you again.
Thanks for that.
Lucky shot.
I reach back out to take the axe and go work on guacamole's chains.
So do you hear flint in your head?
He's been very quiet since well since the thing happened.
Since the backstabbing and body takeover yeah yeah I'd probably be kind of mad too.
I mean again again I don't it wasn't really a backstabbing
we weren't given another option.
Like I see I could maybe see that from your perspective but I but I don't want to um and she.
Oh because how long did you guys have that list of all the things you needed
in order to get me a new body and put my soul in there.
Oh oh I'm sorry.
Because it seemed like it was a while.
I'm sorry did um all the interruption of like
the things that happened on the way to the world ending interrupt you getting your body back.
Very much so yes.
Oh well I'm very sorry.
It was like one of the things you guys had from like so long ago.
Listen you should have taken that up with flint.
I did.
Well now what are you going to do?
Are you going to go through the list of things in order to find flint a body?
Oh I mean I don't I don't know if he's still with us.
What?
As I said very very quiet since the thing.
Feel like there's an asterisk like in comic books it's like
Dumbgeons fans remember back in season one episode 14 when Bort had his head chopped off.
Yeah.
Yep.
Oh good lord.
I don't think I'm ever not going to be mad at you but I think that um us fighting
likely isn't helping our situation.
Please don't cut my bird.
Okay okay yeah no I wasn't gonna.
Uh axe swings down over the chains and they snap free.
Is this axe hoop now Russ is it garbage?
Every hit is taking another chunk out of it as it appears to you.
Okay it could maybe have like one more hit in it though.
Yeah I mean an axe even if you turn it around is a blunt force weapon.
Doesn't have to be sharp to do the job and even at the end you got a stick.
All right we're free.
There's definitely something out there do you think when the red light goes on
we could see in the dark just throw in a theory out there.
How big is the circle of light that we're seeing?
30 feet across.
I mean it's worth a shot.
So Thea wants to wait until the light comes on
and stick her hand out to see if she can see it.
Thea and Bort are standing near the edge of the spotlight.
The sound of the groaning is getting closer
and the light goes again and the horn sounds and there's this screeching noise.
This new screeching noise that comes with it.
Thea moves to put her hand out beyond the spotlight and we cut to a prison sound.
Grancis is seen he's looking in his book.
He's squinting in the dark trying to kind of pilfering through the pages.
There's this echoing crack of sound and displacement of dust and debris
as Vorunax and Lipsinki who you're now like thrown by the travel.
Nauseous would be kind in this manner.
This was not a easy portal as Squeaky McLeemerson has created for you.
Oh that was not normal.
Yeah that was bad.
I don't taste good.
I don't know.
That was not...
How about we just save the world real quick and then stop coming back here.
Save the world and live forever?
Yep yep yep.
Oh thank fucking god you're here.
Oh whoa wait that was the first time anybody said that.
Well it's not because of you being here it means that we did things right.
Oh okay yeah I know.
I'm still glad to see you Grancis.
I'm glad to see you too Vorunax.
How are you?
Are you okay?
Are you I mean aside from the whole prison thing you're alive if it's everybody else alive
like catch us up.
Look to your left.
Okay.
You see a Grancis who's been like splayed out across the floor.
Oh god what?
Look to your right.
Okay there's a Grancis that's sleeping in a cot.
Oh they need to get on.
I mean yeah good for that Grancis.
Yes I'm happy that that Grancis is not on the rack I guess.
So Grancis is fine we've established.
Doing you know doing pretty good.
You two know the inner workings.
How do you get out of here?
I had a goblin help me the last time.
Oh you're talking about Terry.
Oh no.
Was it a different goblin?
It was a different goblin.
It was Flammacan she broke in.
It was a grossly spirit.
She got me out.
It's how I got out the first time.
Through all the things that you know just walked right on out it was easy peasy.
Not sure how you didn't see that one coming.
I don't know either Grancis but it's neither here nor there.
We're uh there's an easy way of getting out of here that doesn't require a goblin.
Oh good oh good good good good good.
It's called a key.
Oh you got a key.
Extended leash key.
Oh hey that doesn't that that looks funny.
Yeah what's funny about it?
Well it looks like a spoon.
It's just kind of like a spoon because it serves up freedom let's go.
And I use a spoon to open the fucking gate.
Can this episode be called serving up freedom?
I would hope so.
Of course the American says serving up freedom.
Well I mean.
It could not have been better.
The transition from Grancis I'm so glad to see you to instantly irritate him.
Well it's Grancis' superpower.
Right oh good okay uh the spoon goes into the lock and you hear it like you hear the
mechanism go and the door leans open.
You push it open and step out into the hall and there's a long hallway either side of you
and down at the end off to your right as you step out is a cracked open door.
A little bit of light looks like from a lantern or a torch um peering through.
The three of you step out and Grancis kind of tucks his book into his side bag and
then he's gone and he's gone and his night hunter is in here somewhere.
I saw her.
Then we should find night hunter.
Dumbgeons and Dragons Season 2 Episode 149 starring Amy More as Thea and Night Hunter.
Carla Maxted as Lipsinki.
Tom Laird as Flint with Kyle Claset as Vorunax and Russ More as your dungeon master.
Dialogue Editing by Carla Maxted and Sound Design by Russ More.
This episode featured music from Epidemic Sound and sound effects from Epidemic Sound,
Boom Library and Sound Ideas.
And a huge thank you to our supporting producers.
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Cat Waterflame, Jacob Madden, Christian Brown,
Craig Zeiss, Perry Matey, Angerong Kiersen, LA Branton, Nathaniel Teeter, Destiny and
Old School Gamer D. Like what we do? Support the productions that we put together
like Dumbgeons and Dragons and Facing Fate and get countless hours of amazing bonus content
at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast.
We hope to see you over there.
That's it for now. Have a great week. We'll talk to you soon.
I hate to be a bopper, but perhaps you could let me out of the cage now.
Do you ever sometimes feel like you're in the middle of a game you don't know how to play?
Yeah. Yeah. It's called life.
I was talking as Thea Tabort. Everyone's like, yeah, no guys, I'm in character right now,
but it's good to know everyone else is just as confused as I am in life. Good stuff. Okay.
Okay. We have a baseline. We don't know what's happening.
Oh, I love it. We'll build off of it.
Thea with the relatable content.
So much so you guys didn't even know I was in character.
Didn't even know. Like, yeah.
Yeah.
Dumbgeons and Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.